Thursday, December 9, 2010


My Dear Cousin Poppy,
Thank you for your voice mail message. It was quite an honor to graduate from puppy school. Please do not think that I am bragging, when I tell you that I was the top of the class. Here are the things that I aced:
* Focus (I already told you about this one. My two legs say it constantly and the beauty of it is that all I have to do is glance at them and I get a treat, Yeahy!)
* Sit (I don't have to tell you how easy this one is. Unfortunately, the two legs have found me out and have stopped giving me treats for this one.)
*DOOOOWWWWNNNNN (I just learned this one. It make the two legs so happy when I do it. I even let the female two legs show off at graduation by walking around my as I stayed in DOOOWWWNNNN.  The teacher, Toni, thought I was brilliant!)
*Go to your bed (do you know this one? I also just learned it. I wasn't too keen on going to my bed in class though, because before class started I took a great big poo in one of the beds and I wasn't quite sure which one it was. I went to my bed anyway so I could get my treat.)
*Touch (I love touch. It's so much fun. My mummy wiggles her fingers high in the air and I jump up to touch them and then I get a treat. It hardly seems fair to get a treat for that one)
*Stay (I stay every morning and night waiting for my food, so this one was easy for me, too)
I could do all of these better than any of the other friends in the class.
The two that were a little more difficult for me are:
*Leave it (How can they possible expect me to just walk by a tasty treat, just because they say "Leave It" and tug at my leash? Don't they know by now that I will do ANYTHING for a treat, even take a little scolding that never lasts very long anyway. Plus, I think they are starting to realize that I am getting stronger every day and their tugs seem like a fly pulling at me.)
*Come (Honestly, Poppy, don't you think that one should only come when one feels like it? I am always so busy when they tell me to COME, COME, COME. Then they shout MUGSY, MUGSY, MUGSY, as if I don't realize what they want me to do. Sometimes I wish the two legs would spend a little more time in school.)
So that is my report. Can you do all these things, Poppy? I bet you can because you Brits are so cleaver...and charming too, my mum says so.

No comments: