Grumpy Old People

Dear Cousin Poppy,
What a busy pup you have been and so, so naughty! Isn't it fun...well, not the getting yelled at part, but I have great fun doing as I please. The best part is seeing the shock and horror on the two legs' faces.  I was just amusing myself this morning making my mum batty.  I could tell she was mad, because it was freezing outside and she stopped walking and tried to make me go down, down, down. Now, you know, Poppy, I know down, down, down very well. But this morning, I just didn't feel like putting my belly on the cold pavement, so I looked the other direction, occasionally I sat, sometimes I bit the leash and acted like a mad Lucy (this really makes mum crazy). Mum yelled into my ear, even gave me a treat or two in desperation, but I held my ground...until I felt horribly guilty for keeping Mum out in the cold. Plus, I was afraid she wouldn't give me a treat when we got home. Sometimes Mum holds a grudge. Such a bad character trait. Don't you agree, Poppy?
I am so embarrassed and upset that my mum and puppaw have been taking me outside NAKED all this time. Why won't they buy me pretty clothes like you? Of course your clothes are tiny and maybe mine would cost too much money, but I don't think I should be naked all the time. I see my friends at the park with nice clothing. Do you really think granny might bring me some clothing? I know my two legs and I don't think they even know that I'm supposed to be wearing anything other than the darn yellow slicker that I tried to do in the last time they put on me.
I know it's hard to be independent. I get a bit whiny when one of my two legs disappears. It's just so much nicer when it's the three of us. It just doesn't seem right when one disappears behind a door. Tell your mum that independence is over-rated.
I had a big weekend, too. My two legs brought a tree inside! Can you believe it? Inside! If I were a boy I would surely be able to pee on it, but the two legs put it way up high so I can hardly even grab a branch.  Plus, I have a feeling that touching the tree would be the last draw.  Does your mum threaten to take you back to the pound? What does that mean? I am not sure what the pound is but I don't like the sound of it it one bit. Anyway, the tree is very pretty with lights and balls all over it. I like to look at so I don't think I will destroy it...yet.
I look forward to more time on skype with you. I was a bit distracted yesterday, so I apologize, but I really had to peeeee!
Licks,
Cousin Mugsy